I decided to start a blog.

I know there are a lot of people that care about me and want to know how I am doing.

So, Where to start? I guess the day I was diagnosed with Stage IV Melanoma would be a good place. It was January 2, 2010. A few moths before my stomach started bothering me, I was getting bad shooting pains that I chalked up to as a bad flu I couldn't shake. As the months went by the pains we getting worse and worse, so bad that I couldn't stand it anymore. I finally went to the doctor. She sent me for tests over the next week. When my blood tests came in, the doctors office told me I had to go to the hospital right away. I remember calling me sister on the way to the hospital and complaining about having to go to the emergency room, It was noon and I had to work at 5.

At the hospital they ran more tests, my blood glucose level was dangerously low. I needed a blood transfusion right away. A normal person should have a Blood Glucose level at about 35, it's dangerous to be lower than 25. I was at a 5. All the doctors and nurses kept saying they did not know how I was walking around. I needed 3 pints of blood.

After my blood transfusions I was sent for Scans. The scans came back showing a large mass in my lower intestine. The doctors thought this was the source of my blood loss and decided to do surgery right away. The mass ended up being a large tumor that tested positive for Malignant Melanoma. I was in the hospital for a total of six days the first time.

After that day it has felt like a whirlwind of things that have happened. I was so scared and wanted it to be over so bad I just listened and did what the doctors told me. I kept thinking, this is horrible but if I do this I can go back to my normal life. I never thought to question the doctors I just did what they said.

The hospital I was at was California Pacific Medical Center in San Francisco. There I was assigned Dr. Minor as my oncologist. He was the one who told me that I had Stage IV Melanoma. I never thought to myself I would get cancer. I don't think anyone does, but I had never felt so helpless in my life. I had no idea what to do. It felt like Dr Minor kind of took me under his control. He seemed very confident in what he was telling me to do, so I just went with it. He decided, and I say this because I still don't feel like this was my decision, that my treatment would be Biochemo therapy. He made it seem like it was my only choice, do that or die! My family has always been so supportive but we were all so clueless about Melanoma.

Even at this point I had no idea what I was in for with the Biochemo. The Doctor said we had to move fast and start the treatment as soon as possible because Melanoma tumors are fast growing. I started treatment on February 1st. What the treatment consisted of was one week in the hospital and then two weeks out for recovery for six cycles. I could of never imagined how horrible, HORRIBLE this treatment would be. In the hospital they were pretty much pumping toxic poisons into my body. I would get severe chills and I got so sick I couldn't eat. I lost thirty pounds over those five months. Each treatment got progressively worse. I thought the sixth one was going to kill me.

To make a bad story worse, once the six treatments were over I had more scans done. The Biochemo had stopped working after the fourth treatment and my tumors had gotten bigger. The tumors did at first respond but like in many people I plateaued. This was such a blow. The only thing that was getting me through it was thinking I would be cured, that I could go back to my normal life when the Biochemo was over.